Cleaning mind, body & soul, rather than the house!

I trained Monday, Wednesday and Thursday this week. Karlie, who is featured in this month's Profile magazine joined me on Wednesday and Thursday. I have been training with her for about 4 weeks and just thought she was tall and slim. Having now seen what she looked like before, the difference is fantastic. What is great is that she is continuing to train and makes time to exercise every day. She is much better at running than me. I put it down to short legs (mine!!) but I hope to one day be able to run better and for much longer.

On Monday I was all on my own so benefitted from a one-to-one session with Bianca. She pushed me really hard and I must admit, I have struggled recently, both a little on the exercise bit, but the eating bit of the programme. My weight hasn't changed, in the last 4 weeks, which is really depressing. I am sure my body has, but I still have fat and horrible days where my size 16 sports pants still fit me snugly and then I have days where I could do one of those funny 'before & after' pictures where you hold out your 'before' whilst still wearing them.

It shows how funny our bodies can be, changing from one day to the next so dramatically. Combine that with our paranoid women minds and we find we can be beating ourselves up for something our body is doing all on it's own at certain times of the month whether we starve, drink water, exercise, or eat cake!!

So if I am totally 100% honest, I am tonight feeling low about my body. Some days I feel my body doesn't look like it should after 12 weeks of hard work, nor weigh what it should. I would have loved to have lost more weight, but then who doesn't want that miracle diet, where we are our ideal weight in 4 weeks! I know deep down, that I have done really well and that I have faced many hurdles along the way and overcome them. So here is what I tell myself

• I have gained muscle and am therefore stronger, both in body and mind
• I am sleeping better
• I have more energy
• I look better
• I have lost over a third of my over-all weight loss target
• I can run for 4 minutes
• I can touch my toes during stretches

So I have one final week of my 12 week programme to go and then my 'after' pictues will be published, just like Karly's. I only hope I can do justice to the programme and as I said before, stimulate people like me, with low esteem, who feel overweight and have tried every diet, who look after everyone else, before looking after themselves and help them realise that unless we (mums, workers, wives, homemakers, taxi's, business women) are fit, healthy and have the energy to cope with all the stuff thrown at us on a day to day basis, loads of the other stuff never works.

So my lesson is, look after yourself, get active, eat healthily, sleep well, don't worry about the small stuff, don't beat yourself up about the cleaning. Does it matter if the ironing isn't done or the dusting is left for a few days? Nothing bad is going to happen if I don't mop the floor or tidy the girls bedroom. Don't put off the walk or the jog because of housework. Start enjoying being you, enjoy the sunshine and get 'you' to be the happiest, heathiest and most energised you can as there are such great benefits and I am only just beginning to work out what they are.

Athough I am coming to the end of the initial challenge, I will still continue to exercise and lose weight to become the weight my 5 foot 1 frame is happy with, and then maintaining it for many years to come. Bianca's lessons, passion and drive will help me get there I am sure.

Please feel free to leave me a comment as I would love to know how many people this blog has affected. I really want to continue with a regular exercise programme with Bianca, Sasha and Seb for a couple more months. Take me up until December so I can get slimmer and fitter for the summer and treat myself to a bikini for Christmas! From there, I dream to be into a routine where I am incorporating exercise into my daily and weekly routine and it not feel at all strange or alien!

Right, I need to go to bed and get off sitting on my butt at this PC. I am up bright and early at the local gym for a 6am circuit work-out before coming home and sorting packed lunches, readers, hairbrushing etc.... you know the routine...

One week to go until D-day. Update you next week and look out for my before and after photo's posted on this site!